Everyone thinks they have a sense of humor, even people who don't.

Scary enough, when I found that picture online (I just googled "Meathead"), it turns out the dude is a fellow blogger on this host site. Small world. Nice necklace.

We've got a new guy who started working in my department. Unfortunately for me, they put him in the cube directly across from mine. And I thought Crotch Grabber guy was a pain in the ass...

So, this new guy is 26, Eye-talian and he thinks he's the Fonz, or someone equally cool. Our first conversation went something like this:

Meathead: You look banged up today. Out drinking last night?

Me: Whaaa? No. I'm just tired.

Meathead: I started drinking when I was 12.

Me: And what, you haven't stopped since? You're drunk now? Good for you.

Meathead: Haha, giggity. Do you go out on the weekends?

Me: Sometimes.

Meathead: I always go out on the weekends. My girlfriend lives in South Jersey. She's 31. I love older women, giggity. I bet you don't go out during the week.

Me: Not usually. I wake up early.

Meathead: Yeah, sometimes I come to work straight from the bar. You're single, huh.

And that's exactly how he said it. It wasn't a question. It was a flat-out statement: You-are-single-HUH. Period.

I couldn't believe it.

With one statement, that little shit made me feel like I was back in high school, minus the over-sized tee shirts and violin case. Here I am, a 31 year old homeowner, and I felt the need to validate my existence on Earth to this creep...the same guy who asked at 11:50am, "Hey, so what do yoose guys do for lunch?"

It's going to be a looooong career. I should've seen it coming when he moved into the cube. He put up the DVD of "Boondock Saints." Yeah, it was a great movie, but he's presenting it like it is a personal photo. Uh, note to douchebag: Just because you like a cool movie, that doesn't make you cool. Christ, if it was that easy, I'd be signing up for Netflix and putting every awesome movie on the list, starting with "The Shawshank Redemption" and ending with "Battlefield Earth."

I'm sure I'll document what happens. I've got a touch of seniority on him, so I feel that gives me some license to tell him to shut the f--- up at times. Wow. I just realized I've been in the new gig for 3 months. If I had gotten knocked up when I started, I'd be making a formal announcement right now!

Imagine that. Giggity.