...which was pointed out to me tonight by two guys I had hired to change the locks on my house so I could make my psuedo-husband my exhusband. Is that ironic? Funny how people develop an opinion of you over a little incident like that.
But...I'd be a liar if I said I didn't think twice about the crap they said about me tonight. They might actually have a point; I'm harsh, I'm crass, I lack an internal filter... and it all made me wonder why anyone still talks to me. I guess I AM kind of a douchebag. Here's just one example:
I mailed out my Christmas cards shortly after Turkey Day. It wasn't much of a surprise when a friend of mine sent me a text message last week asking for my address (obviously wanting to send a card in return). Quick back story: This friend of mine got married overseas in March 2012, held a stateside 'reception' in May of 2012. I gave a nice chunk of change to the newlyweds when I attended the local reception. The story ends there. Unacceptable, and let me explain why.
So....after receiving the "what's your address" text I responded with my address and "Are you finally mailing out Thank You cards?" Yes, it was rude of me to call him out, but with that being said, it's pretty goddamn rude to NOT send Thank You cards to people who gave gifts at your half-assed, "we just want money" reception. I might have been rude by pointing that out, but they are ten times ruder by NOT saying Thank You.
Then I got thinking...this isn't the first time someone hasn't thanked me for being nice. I went to a wedding several years ago where the bride was 7 months pregnant and I gave $100 to eat mac & cheese with plasticwear. I never got a Thank You for that, either.
Here's where things get CRAZY. My sister is NOTORIOUS (yes, it deserves ALL CAPITAL LETTERS) for not only NOT thanking me for gifts, but not even acknowledging they've arrived in the mail in the first place. Really? How is that okay? I mean, okay, I get it, you don't want to take the 1 minute out of your day to call me during your commute (like you would normally do 4 days a week) to say THANKS, but at least have the decency to say, "Oh hey, I got your card/package," so I at least know the mailman didn't steal it. I am at the point I don't even care if I get a "Thanks" or "This Sucks" or "Go to Hell," I just want to know my shit isn't being lifted by some hoarder postal service person with a mental condition.
All of this raging rudeness makes me want to go into business making "You're Welcome" cards, for those rude bastards who are "too cool" to thank you for your time and generosity. Beat them to the punch with a snazzy You're Welcome card! Coming to stores near you...
I guess I'm not sure how this plays out. Am I the rude one for calling out people for their lack of manners? Because I don't think so. And with a new year slowly (but surely) creeping up on us, I'm thinking this is going to be my New Year's Resolution. Everyone Everywhere...Consider this your official warning: If you are going to be rude and/or ignorant, I will unequivocally, 100%, call you out on your piss-poor social skills.
So go ahead and "pretend" you didn't get my gift card for your birthday (Nancy). I will bring it to your attention. Pretend your kids didn't get my holiday cards (sister). I will call you, Rudeness, and point out your lack of manners. And just to take this one step further... Ms Manager of the Team I Work With: You can pretend to care about my "input" on the team's progress, but unbeknownst to you I'm going to blind copy my manager, your manager and a third, "random" manager on that "progress report." Needless to say, you can suck it. Hard.
I'm sick and tired of rude people and people who flat-out don't give a shit. And with that being said...Who the FUDGE puts a gumball machine in a bathroom (refer to picture in post)? Those people will be getting a letter from me AND the PA Health Department. Blind copied as well. Because that's how I roll and if they don't like it, they can suck it. Hard.
I guess you can sign me,
Used To Have Friends in 2012
